Festival season is all but underway. Before you think this is going to turn into one of those snivelling moans about how the line-ups are shit while essentially saying "you haven't booked all my favourite bands. Fail. Me. Me me me! I! My taste is good, everyone else isn't metal" let me say this- Download, Sonisphere and Bloodstock (as much of the latter as has been announced, at least) all have brilliant bills. The headliners through some of the smaller main stage acts right through the second stage headliners to the most obscure tents and trucks, there are some great bands playing. Wherever you go this summer, I'm sure you're going to have a great time, get off your face and have crap tent sex with someone who, under normal circumstances, you wouldn't give a second look. But one thing I have noticed over the years has been thrown into sharp focus by my choice of destination this year.
Until last year, we essentially had two choices for the last decade- Download or Bloodstock. Then last year Stuart Galbraith gave us Sonisphere, and I had a big sex-wee at the prospect of Mastodon, Lamb Of God, Cancer Bats, Machine Head and Metallica all playing on the same day. It was great, I had a fantastic time, got far too hot, drank overpriced beer and generally broke myself for the next week. This year's bookings once again led me into choosing Sonisphere as my festival- if I had the money, I'd go to all three, but as I don't, Knebworth is the place. While all three bills have had their fair share of fucktarded moaners- the smeg-for-brains who cited Cannibal Corpse as evidence that Bloodstock has sold-out, on the basis that the Corpse are a "mainstream" death metal band, was particularly moronic- there does actually appear to be something of a pattern to the three festival bills that I don't think has been touched upon yet. Essentially- Download is the American festival, Bloodstock the European festival, and Sonisphere the British one. If you will bear with me, I'll explain.
Take a second to look at the Download bill. Go on, do it now. Have you seen it? Good. Welcome back. There is an almost overwhelming American presence on the bill. Sure, there are a few other points of origin for the bands, AC/DC, Motorhead and Billy Idol perhaps being the most obvious. But the length of the list of US acts is far longer- including an all-American mainstage on Saturday- stretching right down past Job For A Cowboy headlining the Friday of the third stage. Even those acts not from the other side of the Herring Pond either have considerable success there- such as Bullet For My Valentine, who America has taken to like a teenage boy to an internet connection without parental restrictions- or at the very least you would imagine the US market would hold some potential for. There are a few exceptions, but not until you get down to the level of Die Apokalyptischen Reiter (and yes, of course I had to check the correct spelling of their name). Download is a festival full of either American bands, bands who do well or you suspect may do well in the States and bands either so small or so big it doesn't matter. This is not a criticism- I think the Download bill is great and has a broad range of bands, and it feels like a bill ideal for getting pissed and having a laugh in the sun- it is merely an observation on the character of the festival.
This is hardly a new pattern though. Download may have had some of the biggest names in rock grace Donington Park since the current incarnation came into being seven years ago, but the bill has never simply been a question of "who's big?" (although obviously, as a commercial venture that comes into it). If you want demonstration of big bands that do not fit the Download profile, the obvious example is Emperor. When Ihsahn and Samoth came together for one last time, black metal's finest band headlined Wacken. They did not play Download. In fact, I believe I am right in stating that only three black metal bands have ever played Download- Cradle Of Filth, Dimmu Borgir and Satyricon. While some fairly brutal (and not overly popular) death metal bands populate the fringes of the festival, less heavy (and commercially more successful) black metal bands and the kind of ridiculous widdly power metal I love (some of which would possibly be more of a commercial draw as well) does not feature.
Nor should it. They would not fit. While I'd love to see Immortal back in the UK, I wouldn't want it at Donington. Nor would I particularly be interested in Stratovarius at the famous old site, as much as I'd need someone to peel me off the ceiling if they were playing somewhere else. Download has been running long enough to develop it's own style, it's own ambience, and that should not be messed with without very good reason. If the occasional exception is made- Manowar being the most obvious candidate- that is great, but changing the biggest date on the rock calendar should not even be considered. Not only that, it allows bands such as Slipknot- who would be unlikely to headline a festival elsewhere- to bask in the limelight we want them to have. Download is the UK's American rock festival, and that is how it should stay.
Bloodstock, conversely, is the European festival. It is dominated by bands from the continent (Gorgoroth, Sonata Arctica etc) or those that do their best business there, bands that are so big it doesn't matter (Heaven & Hell would have been the obvious example) and young British bands who would either work on both sides of the Atlantic or more this side than the other. While there are American bands- such as Cannibal Corpse and Fear Factory- they are all bands who fit into those styles popular on the continent (death metal, power metal and over-the-top hard rock). Despite -core-suffixed bands still being amongst the more commercially powerful, they are conspicuous by there absence at Catton Hall. You could transfer the Bloodstock bill (albeit with a much larger undercard) to Wacken, Hellfest or Metalcamp in Ljubljana (I didn't actually have to check that spelling, surprisingly) without it looking out of place.
As great as they are- and as much as they are bands I personally like a great deal- Lamb Of God and Trivium would make me uncomfortable at Bloodstock. They would be as out of place as Abbath at a Hadouken show. Far more old-school American bands- from classic bands like Testament to Municipal Waste, both of whom have played before- or more stylistically Eurocentric American bands (such as Iced Earth or Kamelot) would of course be more than welcome. It is not directly about nationality, more about what fits stylistically. If there was a German version of Machine Head, for example, you feel they would be far more appropriate a booking for Download than Bloodstock. That is the nature of the festival, and as a lover of the sometimes-derided Euro metal and of trve kvlt Norwegian black metal (and a lot of the far less kvlt stuff and non-Norwegian outfits too) I like it that way and want to keep it, in the hope that I will someday have the cash to get to three festivals a year.
The thing that strikes me about both bills is that both appear to be looking to other shores with misty eyes. Download seems to look to the West and wishes it had grown up regularly attending CBGB's and Madison Square Gardens rather than the Astoria and Wembley, while Bloodstock looks firmly towards a little village in Schleswig-Holstein (I knew that spelling too, but only because it comes up in a Flashman novel). In defence of both of them, that was because British rock music was at a real low ebb when they began, and having been forced to focus on European and American talent have now ended up with that as their nature. In reality however, in rock terms, Britain is neither America nor Europe. We do like our American hard rock and our metal influenced by Southern groove and East Coast hardcore. We also like Swedish death/doom, Finnish folk metal and Italian goth stuff. We also like uniquely British bands, be they the techy thrash and death bands coming out of the south of England, the UK hardcore scene and- as much as some may deny this- our alt rock and dance music- specifically in the area of drum and bass.
Look at the Sonisphere bill. It is undoubtably the most diverse of the three bills. Any argument would be as stupid and inaccurate as suggesting to Phil Anselmo's face that he is a weedy midget with a strange sexual prediliction for household furniature. The New Wave Of British Heavy Metal sits alongside alternative rock, reggae metal sits with deathcore, thrash neighbours heavy drum and bass and New York harcore is joined by power metal, just to begin with. Bands that would fit onto the bills of Download, Bloodstock, Reading/Leeds or even more mainstream festivals all have high billing at Knebworth. While Download has had more Scandinavian-accented acts in the past, they have never really been as diverse as the simultaneous presence of Katatonia and Sabaton. This more accurately reflects the diverse tastes of the British rock public than either of the other two our world really pays attention to.
Above and beyond Britain's rather unusual position of appreciating both American and European styles far more than America appreciates European metal or vice versa, there are some very British bands on the bill- and I don't even need to talk about Iron Maiden to demonstrate this.
Skindred could not really have come from anywhere else, and this is historical. Britain has had a far stronger influence from the Caribbean than anywhere outside those countries within that description themselves. The large immigration from former British colonies in the West Indies in the 1950s and '60s brought music with it, some of which is crucial to Skindred's sound. That kind of population movement did not happen to the same extent elsewhere, and only in places like South Wales could a band that sound like them arise.
In a different manner, Pendulum- although Australian- were always going to find most success in the UK, their drum 'n' bass basis being at its most popular in the UK. Skunk Anansie and Placebo are quintessentially British bands- that brand of indie-tinted alt rock does massively less well outside of the UK than it does here. Add in the triumphal Bohemia-headlining performance from Gallows- a band who sound like they could not possibly come from anywhere else, and are an act we can be seriously fucking proud of- and you begin to get a pattern. Some phenomenal bands from the US (Fear Factory and a band I've been trying to resist mentioning, but fuck it- SLAYER!!!), Europe (Rammstein, Europe) and some bands that are very British (not only the above, but Sylosis and Black Spiders amongst others) and you have the British festival that best represents the British rock audience.
This may of course be coincidental- the bookers may have simply put together the best bill they could, and this is how it turned out. It would seem sensible, however, for each event to keep an eye on its identity in terms of their bookings. Not only does this make it less likely that they will suddenly have a slump because they have misjudged their audience, but it also means there are a few bands who are always going to be most suited to one of the three more than the other two. For example, from bands not playing anywhere this summer, Shadows Fall would be best suited to Download, Mayhem to Bloodstock and CapDown to Sonisphere. That is not to say there cannot be an overlap- there must be an overlap, in fact- simply that it gives the ticket-buying punter a much better idea of what they are getting from the outset.
In truth, we actually already have a British metal festival, one representative of Britain's broad metal tastes, and that is Hammerfest. It is probably the only place where DevilDriver and Five Finger Death Punch can comfortably play alongside Akercocke and Dark Funeral, and is genuinely reflective of the metal-buying public's taste for a far less provincial menu than some other countries.
The long and the short of it all is that we have a fantastic selection of festivals, and if one is not to your taste you have others to choose from. So let's all have a few beers and a giggle and watch some bands. I plan to enjoy myself whatever festivals I manage to attend this summer. Make sure you go with the same attitude. Trust me, you'll enjoy it more.
Now I'm off to listen to Keep Of Kalessin's magnificent new album Reptilian and try and persuade Kili and LiveNation to book them for somewhere next summer so I can stand in a field and sing The Dragontower with thousands of other people. I'll try and get them to book Immortal while I'm at it. Any requests?
Monday, 24 May 2010
Tuesday, 18 May 2010
Reflections On Dio
While heavy metal has proven itself to be alive and well as the 21st century enters it’s second decade, with both veterans like Tom G Warrior and his Triptykon project and Gary Holt’s rejuvenated Exodus releasing belting records along with newcomers like Mutiny Within and Aeternam, the world of rock and metal has lost three rather large names in the space of six months. Jimmy Sullivan, Pete Steele and now Ronnie James Dio have all left us since Christmas, and as ever, human tragedy provokes reflection. Two things have been running through my mind since I heard the terrible news of Dio’s death on Sunday night beyond the obvious sadness at the loss of a legend of the music I love.
I’m sure everyone has now read 150 different accounts of the life and brilliance of Ronnie James, and I have no intention of adding my own- mainly because there are a few too many people I feel will do Dio more justice than myself, and I don’t want to seem like I’m entering a “who can say the most nice things” competition. Dio was a complete fucking legend, and deserves better than third-rate hacks stumbling inarticulately across a keyboard as a tribute. We all want to make it clear how much we all loved and respected Dio for his music, but personally I feel more comfortable leaving his obituaries to those who know what they are doing.
What I do want to draw attention to, as the metal world comes to terms with losing one of its icons, is the human tragedy at the heart of it all. I may have felt like utter shit when I read the statement on Blabbermouth confirming the awful rumours that had been flying around the internet all day, but the first line of that most painful of reads was the most important. In case you haven’t read it, or have forgotten it, Wendy said “my heart is broken”. As bollocks as I felt last night, it’s absolutely nothing compared to what Wendy is going through.
Because we, metal and rock fans as a group, tend to throw ourselves into our music and immerse our whole lives in it, whenever one of the leading lights dies, we feel it personally. Whether it be the immense sadness we all feel and express in our own way over the recent deaths of Dio or Pete Steele or the almost hysterical outpouring of grief displayed in 1994 when Kurt Cobain died, the genuine sense of loss is undeniable. What we must not forget is the immeasurable horror the bereaved are going through. While I may not be a particular fan of Avenged Sevenfold, I was truly saddened to hear of Jimmy Sullivan’s death just before the turn of the year- not because of any personal attachment I felt to the man known as The Rev, but because of what his friends and family- and of course, the band themselves, some of whom had known him since childhood- must be going through.
We tend to feel that our heroes somehow belong to us, and in a way they do. I don’t want anyone to think for one second I am somehow criticising or cheapening the emotions many of us are feeling- I’d be a massive fucking hypocrite if I were doing so, as I was practically speechless when I heard the news last night. I tried listening to Holy Diver but found it rather hard, and switched to The Devil You Know, the last record to bear that wonderful voice, as it did not have the same kind of deep, long-standing bond. I was cut-up myself. I would just like everyone to spare a thought for those nearest and dearest to Dio, and to Pete Steele, Jimmy Sullivan, Mike Alexander and anyone else from our world that has died in recent months.
The one thing that has genuinely pissed me off about some of the reactions I have read is the sight of a few total fucktarded wank-stains wishing it had been Ozzy Osbourne rather than Dio. You utter cunts. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone, not even people I genuinely hate. I wish Dio was still alive, I wish he’d never even got cancer and that Heaven & Hell were still going to headline Bloodstock and blow the crowd away like we all know Messrs Dio, Iommi, Butler and Appice would have done had this tragedy not taken place. I would not wish anyone else to suffer this fate in Dio’s place. The suggestion that one of the men responsible for the birth of heavy metal would a better candidate for an untimely death to a vile disease is repugnant. If you’ve even thought that, would you kindly fuck off and not speak… ever. If you can’t say anything that isn’t utterly twattish, don’t say anything at all. I wanted Dio to outlive me, but I don’t want anyone else’s family to be going through what the family of the little fella with the big voice is currently suffering. If you do, be ashamed. If you wish that on the family of the man who sang ‘War Pigs’ and ‘Mr. Crowley’, doubly so.
It was on listening to some of Dio’s finest moments, played by one metal DJ who extended his normal radio show for as long as people wanted to hear Dio songs (Sabbath, Rainbow, Elf, Dio, Heaven & Hell or anything else people could think of), that I reflected on what a stunning voice Dio had, and what a fine musician he was. The variety of the material that DJ had to play- by the way, you know who you are, and you have my immense respect for what you did on Sunday night- and the sheer length of time for which Dio was completely fucking fantastic reminded me how important it is to recognise and appreciate the great talents of our world while we can.
Without doubt, Ronnie James Dio was one of the greatest and most influential vocalists we’ve ever had in metal. As an unashamed fan of power metal, men like Dio are hugely important to the genesis of some of my favourite bands. Without people like Dio, Rob Halford and Bruce Dickenson, we probably would not have Michael Kiske on Keeper Of The Seven Keys, Timo Kotipelto on Visions or Russell Allen on Paradise Lost. Dio had already knocked metal on it’s arse with Heaven And Hell and Holy Diver before any of those records came out, and did it once again after they were all released with The Devil You Know- he may have been hugely important, but wasn’t content with being a heritage musician and, at the age of 67, delivered one of his finest performances in a fifty-plus year career.
With that level of achievement, it is right we hold him in the highest regard. But we must never let our respect and love for what has come before stop us from appreciating what is being done right fucking now, or it might suddenly be gone and we will be left kicking ourselves. It might be easy to think that the younger bands currently at the forefront of their generations musical output have decades left in them. History has shown this is not something to take for granted. In 1986 Metallica has just released Master Of Puppets and seemed only capable of getting better. In 2003, Darrel Abbott was one of the kings of shred and we all thought we would have many more opportunities to see him prove it, both live and on record. When I was forced to miss the Saturday of last year’s Sonisphere, I consoled myself with the thought that there would be more opportunities to see Anthrax with John Bush and Heaven & Hell. Yet Cliff Burton, Dimebag and Ronnie James Dio were all dead within a year of those thoughts, and Joey Belladonna is now back in Anthrax while John Bush must now focus on Armored Saint.
We need to treasure the bands we have now who are doing great things. Who knows how much longer Slipknot will keep going, or when age will creep up on Slayer and force them into retirement from touring. Viatrophy seemed like a band capable of being one of the finest to come out of the UK in a long time, yet their permanent demise is imminent. If, in ten years time, Lamb Of God have jacked it all in and become, in hindsight, one of the highest rated bands of all time, those pillocks who write them off as a Pantera rip-off will be feeling monumentally tit-like at not having subscribed to the “carpe diem” philosophy.
The death of Dio should serve as a reminder to all of us that, while it is absolutely right that we recognise the greats that got us to this point, we have to appreciate what we have, while we have it.
None of us can predict the future- so make sure you take advantage of what the present has to offer.
I’m sure everyone has now read 150 different accounts of the life and brilliance of Ronnie James, and I have no intention of adding my own- mainly because there are a few too many people I feel will do Dio more justice than myself, and I don’t want to seem like I’m entering a “who can say the most nice things” competition. Dio was a complete fucking legend, and deserves better than third-rate hacks stumbling inarticulately across a keyboard as a tribute. We all want to make it clear how much we all loved and respected Dio for his music, but personally I feel more comfortable leaving his obituaries to those who know what they are doing.
What I do want to draw attention to, as the metal world comes to terms with losing one of its icons, is the human tragedy at the heart of it all. I may have felt like utter shit when I read the statement on Blabbermouth confirming the awful rumours that had been flying around the internet all day, but the first line of that most painful of reads was the most important. In case you haven’t read it, or have forgotten it, Wendy said “my heart is broken”. As bollocks as I felt last night, it’s absolutely nothing compared to what Wendy is going through.
Because we, metal and rock fans as a group, tend to throw ourselves into our music and immerse our whole lives in it, whenever one of the leading lights dies, we feel it personally. Whether it be the immense sadness we all feel and express in our own way over the recent deaths of Dio or Pete Steele or the almost hysterical outpouring of grief displayed in 1994 when Kurt Cobain died, the genuine sense of loss is undeniable. What we must not forget is the immeasurable horror the bereaved are going through. While I may not be a particular fan of Avenged Sevenfold, I was truly saddened to hear of Jimmy Sullivan’s death just before the turn of the year- not because of any personal attachment I felt to the man known as The Rev, but because of what his friends and family- and of course, the band themselves, some of whom had known him since childhood- must be going through.
We tend to feel that our heroes somehow belong to us, and in a way they do. I don’t want anyone to think for one second I am somehow criticising or cheapening the emotions many of us are feeling- I’d be a massive fucking hypocrite if I were doing so, as I was practically speechless when I heard the news last night. I tried listening to Holy Diver but found it rather hard, and switched to The Devil You Know, the last record to bear that wonderful voice, as it did not have the same kind of deep, long-standing bond. I was cut-up myself. I would just like everyone to spare a thought for those nearest and dearest to Dio, and to Pete Steele, Jimmy Sullivan, Mike Alexander and anyone else from our world that has died in recent months.
The one thing that has genuinely pissed me off about some of the reactions I have read is the sight of a few total fucktarded wank-stains wishing it had been Ozzy Osbourne rather than Dio. You utter cunts. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone, not even people I genuinely hate. I wish Dio was still alive, I wish he’d never even got cancer and that Heaven & Hell were still going to headline Bloodstock and blow the crowd away like we all know Messrs Dio, Iommi, Butler and Appice would have done had this tragedy not taken place. I would not wish anyone else to suffer this fate in Dio’s place. The suggestion that one of the men responsible for the birth of heavy metal would a better candidate for an untimely death to a vile disease is repugnant. If you’ve even thought that, would you kindly fuck off and not speak… ever. If you can’t say anything that isn’t utterly twattish, don’t say anything at all. I wanted Dio to outlive me, but I don’t want anyone else’s family to be going through what the family of the little fella with the big voice is currently suffering. If you do, be ashamed. If you wish that on the family of the man who sang ‘War Pigs’ and ‘Mr. Crowley’, doubly so.
It was on listening to some of Dio’s finest moments, played by one metal DJ who extended his normal radio show for as long as people wanted to hear Dio songs (Sabbath, Rainbow, Elf, Dio, Heaven & Hell or anything else people could think of), that I reflected on what a stunning voice Dio had, and what a fine musician he was. The variety of the material that DJ had to play- by the way, you know who you are, and you have my immense respect for what you did on Sunday night- and the sheer length of time for which Dio was completely fucking fantastic reminded me how important it is to recognise and appreciate the great talents of our world while we can.
Without doubt, Ronnie James Dio was one of the greatest and most influential vocalists we’ve ever had in metal. As an unashamed fan of power metal, men like Dio are hugely important to the genesis of some of my favourite bands. Without people like Dio, Rob Halford and Bruce Dickenson, we probably would not have Michael Kiske on Keeper Of The Seven Keys, Timo Kotipelto on Visions or Russell Allen on Paradise Lost. Dio had already knocked metal on it’s arse with Heaven And Hell and Holy Diver before any of those records came out, and did it once again after they were all released with The Devil You Know- he may have been hugely important, but wasn’t content with being a heritage musician and, at the age of 67, delivered one of his finest performances in a fifty-plus year career.
With that level of achievement, it is right we hold him in the highest regard. But we must never let our respect and love for what has come before stop us from appreciating what is being done right fucking now, or it might suddenly be gone and we will be left kicking ourselves. It might be easy to think that the younger bands currently at the forefront of their generations musical output have decades left in them. History has shown this is not something to take for granted. In 1986 Metallica has just released Master Of Puppets and seemed only capable of getting better. In 2003, Darrel Abbott was one of the kings of shred and we all thought we would have many more opportunities to see him prove it, both live and on record. When I was forced to miss the Saturday of last year’s Sonisphere, I consoled myself with the thought that there would be more opportunities to see Anthrax with John Bush and Heaven & Hell. Yet Cliff Burton, Dimebag and Ronnie James Dio were all dead within a year of those thoughts, and Joey Belladonna is now back in Anthrax while John Bush must now focus on Armored Saint.
We need to treasure the bands we have now who are doing great things. Who knows how much longer Slipknot will keep going, or when age will creep up on Slayer and force them into retirement from touring. Viatrophy seemed like a band capable of being one of the finest to come out of the UK in a long time, yet their permanent demise is imminent. If, in ten years time, Lamb Of God have jacked it all in and become, in hindsight, one of the highest rated bands of all time, those pillocks who write them off as a Pantera rip-off will be feeling monumentally tit-like at not having subscribed to the “carpe diem” philosophy.
The death of Dio should serve as a reminder to all of us that, while it is absolutely right that we recognise the greats that got us to this point, we have to appreciate what we have, while we have it.
None of us can predict the future- so make sure you take advantage of what the present has to offer.
Sunday, 2 May 2010
Nirvana bashing- why it became fashionable, and why it must stop
At what point did it become acceptable- fuck that, it's even worse- at what point did it become the norm to slag off one of the most seminal rock bands of all time, a band that are a significant part of the adolescence of a generation? I can't hear the name Nirvana amongst rock fans without someone laying into them. "Overrated" appears to be the word that most people agree on, with "dated" not far behind. If for one second I actually thought those were the real reasons, I would drop it. I don't- usually because it comes from people who are big fans of overrated and dated stuff, and I should know, I'm a big fan of overrated, dated old shit myself. No, the reason is simple- Nirvana became mainstream and critically acclaimed by the same people who shop in H&M and listen to Elbow, and we can't abide any band that does that.
Nirvana were the outlet of every fucked-up teenager unaware of Slayer between 1991 and Green Day releasing Dookie, and many more for years after that. If you don't believe me, check the sales figures and the size of the shows they played before the unfortunate coming together of mouth and shotgun barrel. The helpless angst that permeates Nevermind and the manic, distorted confusion of In Utero speaks to every kid who can't quite work people out and feels misunderstood, who can't get girls to like him, who's having a shitty time at school and a shitty time at home and generally finds that life is suddenly a lot less simple and less fun than than it used to be. The problem is that most of those kids learned to function in society, got married and now have 2.4 children and a mortgage on a nice three bedroom semi in the suburbs while generally feeling quite content with life. But the man who was once that kid still likes to recapture his youth and feel dangerous now and then, and the band it is acceptable to listen to is Nirvana- no one thinks you're weird or immature for liking it, even if the truth is that you are. It's become a staple of 30-somethings talking about their yoof and about influential music on BBC2.
Now, as fans of music that would scare the living shit out of 30-somethings on BBC2 who live in a nice house in Tufnell Park, the moment we see them liking a band, something in us recoils slightly. When our mates who listen to Coldplay say they liked Nirvana, our instinct is to decry it as tame shit and talk about how Faith No More and Pantera were really far more influential from that period. While that is true- and both are, all things considered, better bands- Nevermind and In Utero are two absolutely belting records (I'll forgive them Bleach, which is dull). It's not the fault of the music if Kerrang!, NME and various ignorant arseholes on Channel 4 countdowns talk about them like they are the best and most influential band since Robert Johnson met a bloke with horns and a forked tail on a crossroads in Georgia. Just because people have hyped Nirvana beyond the point at which any music can satisfy does not mean those aren't two genuinely great albums.
If you want to talk about bands that are overrated and/or dated, here's a couple for you:
The Sex Pistols- one album, it's great but sounds dated by the standards of punk since, and they were a joke band, really. Heralded as the biggest and most important punk band ever- they're not. They're still great though, and I love Never Mind The Bollocks
The Beatles- hailed as the greatest musicians of all time, half of their songs are essentially the same track (the ones by Paul, mainly) and they were only around, what, seven years? Greatest musicians of all time? Oh please fuck off. They are still a great band though, and there's something wrong with you if you don't like 'Hard Day's Night' or 'I Saw Her Standing There'
If we're talking about individual records, let's look at one more example:
British Steel- frequently cited as one of the finest metal albums of them all, it sounds very much of its time and was so hyped by the time I actually heard it, I was half expecting the music to come out of the speaker and perform an act upon my person. Unsurprisingly, my expectations weren't met. Yet it's an astounding record, and any metal fan that doesn't own it should slap themselves- hard.
In all of those examples, the hype is too much and wankers talk about them too often to try and sound knowledgeable and credible. Nevermind and Nirvana cannot live up to the hype. With the possible exception of Metallica between 1984 and 1986, I can't think of anything I've ever heard that could live up to the hype given The Beatles, The Sex Pistols or Nirvana. Through a combination of the twaddle spouted by pillocks who appear on TV in River Island jumpers while on leather couches in faux-seedy club lighting and the fact that people who listen to music we despise now propose Nirvana as one of the all time greats, those of us who love the more extreme end of the rock spectrum have rejected them.
To make sure my memories weren't rose-tinted by nostalgia, I pulled out In Utero and Nevermind and gave them a concerted listen. They are as great as I remember. Smells Like Teen Spirit still makes me want to trash the place. Lounge Act still makes me want to get laid as soon as possible. I still feel like I'm isolated and misunderstood during Heart Shaped Box (I'm 26 for fuck's sake! I should be way too old for music to make me feel like that!), and All Apologies is still the most bittersweet post-orgasmic euphoria on record.
My point is this- just because dickheads who listen to bollocks music (or at least, music we don't like) talk about a band- any band- doesn't mean they stop being good. Just because some twonk makes a band sound far better than it is possible to be does not lessen how good they are.
Are Nirvana the best or most influential band of all time? Of course not! They're not even the best or most influential band of the 90s (FNM, Pantera and Green Day are far more important, to name just three). Were Nirvana a fucking great band for two records, and are they hugely important in the personal musical development (as pretentious as that sounds) of millions of people? Fuck yes! And it's about time we reclaimed them from those pillocks. They're ours, cardigan-brigade, you can't have them. You're not allowed to talk about them anymore- not unless you can say the name of Kerry King's band correctly.
It's also time our end of the spectrum stopped slagging them off. No one points out that Anthrax are comfortably the least of the Big Four. Why? Because we all love Anthrax, even if we love Slayer, Megadeth and Metallica more (and quite a few of us love Exodus and Testament more as well), and because rentaquotes don't spout arsewater about them on primetime mainstream telly. When asked about Anthrax, no one says "yeah, they've had some good stuff, but Megadeth are better", we say "Anthrax are a fucking great band! Scott Ian's a total legend!", which is how it should be. So can we all stop describing Nirvana as "overrated" and "dated" and focus on the fact they are a great band rather than pointing out (however correctly) that Alice In Chains are better?
And having spoken about something genuinely NOT metal for a while, I'm off to listen to Gorgoroth's rather brilliant Ad Majorem Sathanas Gloriam. Probably followed by Rhapsody Of Fire's latest great The Frozen Tears Of Angels. Because I'm apparently not metal either.
Nirvana were the outlet of every fucked-up teenager unaware of Slayer between 1991 and Green Day releasing Dookie, and many more for years after that. If you don't believe me, check the sales figures and the size of the shows they played before the unfortunate coming together of mouth and shotgun barrel. The helpless angst that permeates Nevermind and the manic, distorted confusion of In Utero speaks to every kid who can't quite work people out and feels misunderstood, who can't get girls to like him, who's having a shitty time at school and a shitty time at home and generally finds that life is suddenly a lot less simple and less fun than than it used to be. The problem is that most of those kids learned to function in society, got married and now have 2.4 children and a mortgage on a nice three bedroom semi in the suburbs while generally feeling quite content with life. But the man who was once that kid still likes to recapture his youth and feel dangerous now and then, and the band it is acceptable to listen to is Nirvana- no one thinks you're weird or immature for liking it, even if the truth is that you are. It's become a staple of 30-somethings talking about their yoof and about influential music on BBC2.
Now, as fans of music that would scare the living shit out of 30-somethings on BBC2 who live in a nice house in Tufnell Park, the moment we see them liking a band, something in us recoils slightly. When our mates who listen to Coldplay say they liked Nirvana, our instinct is to decry it as tame shit and talk about how Faith No More and Pantera were really far more influential from that period. While that is true- and both are, all things considered, better bands- Nevermind and In Utero are two absolutely belting records (I'll forgive them Bleach, which is dull). It's not the fault of the music if Kerrang!, NME and various ignorant arseholes on Channel 4 countdowns talk about them like they are the best and most influential band since Robert Johnson met a bloke with horns and a forked tail on a crossroads in Georgia. Just because people have hyped Nirvana beyond the point at which any music can satisfy does not mean those aren't two genuinely great albums.
If you want to talk about bands that are overrated and/or dated, here's a couple for you:
The Sex Pistols- one album, it's great but sounds dated by the standards of punk since, and they were a joke band, really. Heralded as the biggest and most important punk band ever- they're not. They're still great though, and I love Never Mind The Bollocks
The Beatles- hailed as the greatest musicians of all time, half of their songs are essentially the same track (the ones by Paul, mainly) and they were only around, what, seven years? Greatest musicians of all time? Oh please fuck off. They are still a great band though, and there's something wrong with you if you don't like 'Hard Day's Night' or 'I Saw Her Standing There'
If we're talking about individual records, let's look at one more example:
British Steel- frequently cited as one of the finest metal albums of them all, it sounds very much of its time and was so hyped by the time I actually heard it, I was half expecting the music to come out of the speaker and perform an act upon my person. Unsurprisingly, my expectations weren't met. Yet it's an astounding record, and any metal fan that doesn't own it should slap themselves- hard.
In all of those examples, the hype is too much and wankers talk about them too often to try and sound knowledgeable and credible. Nevermind and Nirvana cannot live up to the hype. With the possible exception of Metallica between 1984 and 1986, I can't think of anything I've ever heard that could live up to the hype given The Beatles, The Sex Pistols or Nirvana. Through a combination of the twaddle spouted by pillocks who appear on TV in River Island jumpers while on leather couches in faux-seedy club lighting and the fact that people who listen to music we despise now propose Nirvana as one of the all time greats, those of us who love the more extreme end of the rock spectrum have rejected them.
To make sure my memories weren't rose-tinted by nostalgia, I pulled out In Utero and Nevermind and gave them a concerted listen. They are as great as I remember. Smells Like Teen Spirit still makes me want to trash the place. Lounge Act still makes me want to get laid as soon as possible. I still feel like I'm isolated and misunderstood during Heart Shaped Box (I'm 26 for fuck's sake! I should be way too old for music to make me feel like that!), and All Apologies is still the most bittersweet post-orgasmic euphoria on record.
My point is this- just because dickheads who listen to bollocks music (or at least, music we don't like) talk about a band- any band- doesn't mean they stop being good. Just because some twonk makes a band sound far better than it is possible to be does not lessen how good they are.
Are Nirvana the best or most influential band of all time? Of course not! They're not even the best or most influential band of the 90s (FNM, Pantera and Green Day are far more important, to name just three). Were Nirvana a fucking great band for two records, and are they hugely important in the personal musical development (as pretentious as that sounds) of millions of people? Fuck yes! And it's about time we reclaimed them from those pillocks. They're ours, cardigan-brigade, you can't have them. You're not allowed to talk about them anymore- not unless you can say the name of Kerry King's band correctly.
It's also time our end of the spectrum stopped slagging them off. No one points out that Anthrax are comfortably the least of the Big Four. Why? Because we all love Anthrax, even if we love Slayer, Megadeth and Metallica more (and quite a few of us love Exodus and Testament more as well), and because rentaquotes don't spout arsewater about them on primetime mainstream telly. When asked about Anthrax, no one says "yeah, they've had some good stuff, but Megadeth are better", we say "Anthrax are a fucking great band! Scott Ian's a total legend!", which is how it should be. So can we all stop describing Nirvana as "overrated" and "dated" and focus on the fact they are a great band rather than pointing out (however correctly) that Alice In Chains are better?
And having spoken about something genuinely NOT metal for a while, I'm off to listen to Gorgoroth's rather brilliant Ad Majorem Sathanas Gloriam. Probably followed by Rhapsody Of Fire's latest great The Frozen Tears Of Angels. Because I'm apparently not metal either.
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